Phrase by 'Ron White'
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I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
Author: Ron White - American ComedianLife , You , Believe , Funny
The way my brain processes information is quite odd. I mean, I have Attention Deficit Disorder and another learning disability I can't even spell. I don't even have a high school diploma. I'm smart, but you can't prove it on paper.
Author: Ron White - American ComedianYou , School , Brain , Learning
There are two kinds of comics; there are the ones who build bridges, and then there are the people who walk across the bridges as though they built them. The bridge builders are few and far between.
Author: Ron White - American ComedianPeople , Bridge , Build , Walk
There were years when I was a beer and tequila guy, then I got real fat. And then I found that you could actually go on a diet and drink scotch. Then I got hooked on scotch, and if you get hooked on scotch, then everything else just tastes wrong.
Author: Ron White - American ComedianYou , Drink , Fat , Beer
Anybody could say anything they want about me, and it literally never penetrates my skin.
Author: Ron White - American ComedianMe , Never , Want , Skin
There's not a pill you can take; there's not a class you can go to. Stupid is forever.
Author: Ron White - American ComedianYou , Stupid , Class , Forever
When I was a kid, mostly I played in a ditch that didn't have much water in it. It was for drainage purposes. There was not a lot trouble to get into in that ditch. It was ditch activities like catching crawdads and minnows.
Author: Ron White - American ComedianLike , Trouble , Water , Kid
My only goal is to make you laugh, not tell you the truth.
Author: Ron White - American ComedianYou , Truth , Tell , Laugh
I've gathered some of my close musical and comedian friends, and we're going to see if we can't bring a few laughs to these soldiers, raise some money, and hopefully lift their spirits. I consider it an honor and a privilege to give back however I can for the many sacrifices of these incredibly brave men and women.
Author: Ron White - American ComedianFriends , Money , Men , Women
The Majestic Theatre in San Antone is as good as it gets.
Author: Ron White - American ComedianGood , Theatre , Gets , Majestic
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