Phrase by 'Lisa Lampanelli'

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People with HIV and AIDS are nothing to be afraid of. They are people just like every single one of us, and each has a story to tell. These people should be helped, embraced, and not dismissed. We need to open our hearts and our minds to them, and we just may learn we're pretty much all the same.

Author: Lisa Lampanelli - American Comedian
  People , Nothing , Single , Story


When I say I'm going gangster, I'm working really hard at something.

Author: Lisa Lampanelli - American Comedian
  Something , Say , Hard , Gangster


Howard Stern gave me the best advice about Twitter and the N word. He said maybe onstage people get the intention behind the joke, but a tweet is 140 characters or less, and maybe that's why people overreact. I don't need to rustle any more feathers and lose any investors.

Author: Lisa Lampanelli - American Comedian
  Me , People , Best , Lose


In the end, censoring a comedian's jokes is on par with censoring 'Huckleberry Finn.' Now, I'm not comparing myself to Mark Twain - he had much wavier hair and a slightly thicker mustache. But when you deny an artist the chance to explore his art, you're forcing your beliefs on him.

Author: Lisa Lampanelli - American Comedian
  You , Myself , Art , Hair


'Baywatch' sucks so bad. I didn't watch it the first time around; I'm sure not going to buy a DVD. But really, you just kind of find out the categories of what's most foolish about these people. With Hasselhoff, it's obviously the huge man-tits with chest hair, probably a lot about his crappy acting, obviously the hamburger video - that's huge.

Author: Lisa Lampanelli - American Comedian
  You , People , Time , Hair


Every day, I wake up and ask, 'Am I hungry?' If I'm physically hungry, I eat something that's hopefully good for me, and then do it again in a few hours. If I get a phone call I don't like, I'll say to myself, 'Is that the reason I want to eat something?' If it is, I try not to do it. It's literally a lifestyle.

Author: Lisa Lampanelli - American Comedian
  Me , Myself , Day , Good


Insult comedy has been around forever. I can make fun of people, and they won't get mad at me.

Author: Lisa Lampanelli - American Comedian
  Me , People , Fun , Comedy


I don't sell myself. I've never explained my comedy to people who don't get it. Never complain. Never explain.

Author: Lisa Lampanelli - American Comedian
  Myself , People , Never , Comedy


It used to be that in media, Johnny Carson used to be the most important person when he would invite you over to sit on the couch after your comedy skit. Now it's whatever Howard Stern says goes.

Author: Lisa Lampanelli - American Comedian
  You , Important , Comedy , Media


I keep getting asked out by really young, good looking boys and really ugly lesbians. So, even if I wanted to jump onto the tuna boat, I wouldn't because I'm not getting high-class babes that I should get at this level of my career. And I always know the ugly ones are serious and that the good-looking ones are goofing on me.

Author: Lisa Lampanelli - American Comedian
  Me , Good , Looking , Ugly


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